


a beginning needs an end

by shchi



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Don't copy to another site, F/F, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Suicide, One Shot, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:06:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27250168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shchi/pseuds/shchi
Summary: The mirror crack'd from side to side;"The curse is come upon me," criedThe Lady of Shalott.
Relationships: Dani Clayton/Jamie
Kudos: 18





	1. with poem

**Author's Note:**

> finally watched it.
> 
> the poem is _the lady of shalott _but i'm sure you already knew that!__
> 
> _  
> _you can either read with or without the poem, but if you have a broad mind, i think it fits_  
> _
> 
> i just wanted to write something as soon as i finished the series and this is what i came up with. enjoy!

_ On either side the river lie _

_ Long fields of barley and of rye, _

_ That clothe the wold and meet the sky; _

_ And thro' the field the road runs by _

_To many-tower'd Camelot;_

_ And up and down the people go, _

_ Gazing where the lilies blow _

_ Round an island there below, _

_The island of Shalott._

_ Willows whiten, aspens quiver, _

_ Little breezes dusk and shiver _

_ Thro' the wave that runs for ever _

_ By the island in the river _

_Flowing down to Camelot._

_ Four gray walls, and four gray towers, _

_ Overlook a space of flowers, _

_ And the silent isle imbowers _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ By the margin, willow veil'd, _

_ Slide the heavy barges trail'd _

_ By slow horses; and unhail'd _

_ The shallop flitteth silken-sail'd _

_Skimming down to Camelot:_

_ But who hath seen her wave her hand? _

_ Or at the casement seen her stand? _

_ Or is she known in all the land, _

_The Lady of Shalott?_

_ Only reapers, reaping early _

_ In among the bearded barley, _

_ Hear a song that echoes cheerly _

_ From the river winding clearly, _

_Down to tower'd Camelot:_

_ And by the moon the reaper weary, _

_ Piling sheaves in uplands airy, _

_ Listening, whispers " 'Tis the fairy _

_Lady of Shalott."_

  
  


Jamie never recovered from Dani’s death. At first, she was annoyed, as anyone would be, but with time to process, she knew that she would have done the same thing if it was her in Dani’s shoes.

  
  


She loved her, she didn’t want to harm her. Except the only one to guarantee that was death itself. The pain of losing Dani never left Jamie. How could it? If it did, it wouldn’t have been normal, right?

  
  


Ten years. Ten years they had together. Jamie supposes that she should be happy about that. It’s more than most people in horror franchises receive, except this wasn’t a movie or TV show, it was real. It actually happened, and only the people who lived at Bly Manor would believe her.

  
  


But that’s ok.

  
  


She’s not here for fame, not here to be the next best selling horror writer. She lives to remember Dani.

  
  


_ There she weaves by night and day _

_ A magic web with colours gay. _

_ She has heard a whisper say, _

_ A curse is on her if she stay _

_To look down to Camelot._

_ She knows not what the curse may be, _

_ And so she weaveth steadily, _

_ And little other care hath she, _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ And moving thro' a mirror clear _

_ That hangs before her all the year, _

_ Shadows of the world appear. _

_ There she sees the highway near _

_Winding down to Camelot:_

_ There the river eddy whirls, _

_ And there the surly village-churls, _

_ And the red cloaks of market girls, _

_Pass onward from Shalott._

_ Sometimes a troop of damsels glad, _

_ An abbot on an ambling pad, _

_ Sometimes a curly shepherd-lad, _

_ Or long-hair'd page in crimson clad, _

_Goes by to tower'd Camelot;_

_ And sometimes thro' the mirror blue _

_ The knights come riding two and two: _

_ She hath no loyal knight and true, _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ But in her web she still delights _

_ To weave the mirror's magic sights, _

_ For often thro' the silent nights _

_ A funeral, with plumes and lights _

_And music, went to Camelot:_

_ Or when the moon was overhead, _

_ Came two young lovers lately wed: _

_ "I am half sick of shadows," said _

_The Lady of Shalott._

  
  


It’s a life she’s happy with, so she wouldn’t change it. Even if her time is drawing nearer and nearer. She knows it, too. Every drag from the cigarette, every sip from the bottle. Neither will help her condition.

  
  


She doesn’t want it to help, just to ease the suffering. It does it’s part.

  
  


That’s all she needs. All she wants.

  
  


Yet, that is not entirely true. All that she needed, all that she wanted… was gone. However, dead doesn’t mean gone, and Jamie can understand that. She thinks of Dani, but she can’t stop the tears, and she reaches for the bottle or the lighter, whichever is nearest.

  
  


_ A bow-shot from her bower-eaves, _

_ He rode between the barley-sheaves, _

_ The sun came dazzling thro' the leaves, _

_ And flamed upon the brazen greaves _

_Of bold Sir Lancelot._

_ A red-cross knight for ever kneel'd _

_ To a lady in his shield, _

_ That sparkled on the yellow field, _

_Beside remote Shalott._

_ The gemmy bridle glitter'd free, _

_ Like to some branch of stars we see _

_ Hung in the golden Galaxy. _

_ The bridle bells rang merrily _

_As he rode down to Camelot:_

_ And from his blazon'd baldric slung _

_ A mighty silver bugle hung, _

_ And as he rode his armour rung, _

_Beside remote Shalott._

_ All in the blue unclouded weather _

_ Thick-jewell'd shone the saddle-leather, _

_ The helmet and the helmet-feather _

_ Burn'd like one burning flame together, _

_As he rode down to Camelot._

_ As often thro' the purple night, _

_ Below the starry clusters bright, _

_ Some bearded meteor, trailing light, _

_Moves over still Shalott._

_ His broad clear brow in sunlight glow'd; _

_ On burnish'd hooves his war-horse trode; _

_ From underneath his helmet flow'd _

_ His coal-black curls as on he rode, _

_As he rode down to Camelot._

_ From the bank and from the river _

_ He flash'd into the crystal mirror, _

_ "Tirra lirra," by the river _

_Sang Sir Lancelot._

_ She left the web, she left the loom, _

_ She made three paces thro' the room, _

_ She saw the water-lily bloom, _

_ She saw the helmet and the plume, _

_She look'd down to Camelot._

_ Out flew the web and floated wide; _

_ The mirror crack'd from side to side; _

_ "The curse is come upon me," cried _

_The Lady of Shalott._

  
  


Another cough, another aching chest.

  
  


Another long think about whether or not this is worth it.

  
  


One night, Jamie decides enough is enough. Life has nothing left in store for her, so why should she try and wait it out? Why should she suffer unnecessarily?

  
  


The easiest option is right in front of her.

  
  


The doctor prescribed her sleeping pills since she has always found trouble sleeping after losing Dani.

  
  


Every night in which she slept with Dani by her side, she had no trouble whatsoever. Easily the best nights of her life.

  
  


Every night after? Not so much. 

  
  


It’s gone on too long.

  
  
  


Tonight is the night she will be with her wife.

  
  


_ In the stormy east-wind straining, _

_ The pale yellow woods were waning, _

_ The broad stream in his banks complaining, _

_ Heavily the low sky raining _

_Over tower'd Camelot;_

_ Down she came and found a boat _

_ Beneath a willow left afloat, _

_ And round about the prow she wrote _

_ The Lady of Shalott. _

_ And down the river's dim expanse _

_ Like some bold seër in a trance, _

_ Seeing all his own mischance— _

_ With a glassy countenance _

_Did she look to Camelot._

_ And at the closing of the day _

_ She loosed the chain, and down she lay; _

_ The broad stream bore her far away, _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ Lying, robed in snowy white _

_ That loosely flew to left and right— _

_ The leaves upon her falling light— _

_ Thro' the noises of the night _

_She floated down to Camelot:_

_ And as the boat-head wound along _

_ The willowy hills and fields among, _

_ They heard her singing her last song, _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ Heard a carol, mournful, holy, _

_ Chanted loudly, chanted lowly, _

_ Till her blood was frozen slowly, _

_ And her eyes were darken'd wholly, _

_Turn'd to tower'd Camelot._

_ For ere she reach'd upon the tide _

_ The first house by the water-side, _

_ Singing in her song she died, _

_The Lady of Shalott._

_ Under tower and balcony, _

_ By garden-wall and gallery, _

_ A gleaming shape she floated by, _

_ Dead-pale between the houses high, _

_Silent into Camelot._

_ Out upon the wharfs they came, _

_ Knight and burgher, lord and dame, _

_ And round the prow they read her name, _

_ The Lady of Shalott. _

_ Who is this? and what is here? _

_ And in the lighted palace near _

_ Died the sound of royal cheer; _

_ And they cross'd themselves for fear, _

_All the knights at Camelot:_

_ But Lancelot mused a little space; _

_ He said, "She has a lovely face; _

_ God in his mercy lend her grace, _

_The Lady of Shalott."_

She doesn’t remember anything after placing the little plastic bottle on her bedside table as the drowsiness soon took over.

She wakes up to light.

  
  


Bright white.

  
  


Blinding.

  
  


She squints until her eyes adjust. Then she realises. 

  
  


She turns upon sensing another presence, one that she knows all too well -- one that she’s been waiting for all this time. She can’t stop the grin from appearing on her face as she’s reunited with her wife.

  
  


“Dani!”

  
  


And everything is perfectly splendid.


	2. without poem

Jamie never recovered from Dani’s death. At first, she was annoyed, as anyone would be, but with time to process, she knew that she would have done the same thing if it was her in Dani’s shoes.

  
  


She loved her, she didn’t want to harm her. Except the only one to guarantee that was death itself. The pain of losing Dani never left Jamie. How could it? If it did, it wouldn’t have been normal, right?

  
  


Ten years. Ten years they had together. Jamie supposes that she should be happy about that. It’s more than most people in horror franchises receive, except this wasn’t a movie or TV show, it was real. It actually happened, and only the people who lived at Bly Manor would believe her.

  
  


But that’s ok.

  
  


She’s not here for fame, not here to be the next best selling horror writer. She lives to remember Dani.

* * *

It’s a life she’s happy with, so she wouldn’t change it. Even if her time is drawing nearer and nearer. She knows it, too. Every drag from the cigarette, every sip from the bottle. Neither will help her condition.

  
  


She doesn’t want it to help, just to ease the suffering. It does it’s part.

  
  


That’s all she needs. All she wants.

  
  


Yet, that is not entirely true. All that she needed, all that she wanted… was gone. However, dead doesn’t mean gone, and Jamie can understand that. She thinks of Dani, but she can’t stop the tears, and she reaches for the bottle or the lighter, whichever is nearest.

* * *

Another cough, another aching chest.

  
  


Another long think about whether or not this is worth it.

  
  


One night, Jamie decides enough is enough. Life has nothing left in store for her, so why should she try and wait it out? Why should she suffer unnecessarily?

  
  


The easiest option is right in front of her.

  
  


The doctor prescribed her sleeping pills since she has always found trouble sleeping after losing Dani.

  
  


Every night in which she slept with Dani by her side, she had no trouble whatsoever. Easily the best nights of her life.

  
  


Every night after? Not so much. 

  
  


It’s gone on too long.

  
  
  


Tonight is the night she will be with her wife.

* * *

She doesn’t remember anything after placing the little plastic bottle on her bedside table as the drowsiness soon took over.

She wakes up to light.

  
  


Bright white.

  
  


Blinding.

  
  


She squints until her eyes adjust. Then she realises. 

  
  


She turns upon sensing another presence, one that she knows all too well -- one that she’s been waiting for all this time. She can’t stop the grin from appearing on her face as she’s reunited with her wife.

  
  


“Dani!”

  
  


And everything is perfectly splendid.


End file.
